I recently got a new job. I work at a place in the mall. I really shouldn't tell you the name of it. I'm sure if my boss finds out that I am writing about this, I could get in a lot of trouble. I work at a place that sells suits for men. All kinds of suits and men's clothing. That is all I can say about it. If I give the name, someone might read this and call my boss. That is the last thing that I need!

I work full time and I am going to college part time. It will probably take me ten years to graduate, but I guess that is life. I have no choice, I can't afford my bills and go to school full time. I don't have rich parents that can pay for my college. I'm kind of glad that I don't. I don't want to get used to someone else paying all of my bills. I know people in college that their parents pay for everything and I know they won't work when they get out of college. They will just bleed their parents dry.

I've been at this job only a few weeks. My last job was working at a ice cream shop. I hated that job, but I had been doing it for over two years. We made all of the ice cream from scratch. It sure tasted good, but it was a lot of work. Not only that, but they didn't pay very well either. I make two dollars more an hour working at the men's clothing shop. I will probably though work at the ice cream shop in the summer time. Only because I won't have any school and I could make a few extra bucks to help pay for my college costs. The prices of books keep going up and up!

Most of the guys who come in and buy suits, have good jobs. Most men who wear suits to work, tend to make good money. When was the last time you saw a guy flipping burgers wearing a suit? Mostly business men wear suits.

I get to meet a lot of cute guys. Some of them are kind of old, but not all of them are. Sometimes when an old man comes in and buys a suit, I wonder if he is buying it for his funeral. I know that sounds mean, but you never know. A lot of these old guys try to buy suits that make them look young. They will buy ties that are really colorful. As I heard one man say on TV, you have to leave a great looking corpse behind.

As you can imagine, I don't have much of a life. I am so busy with school and work, that I don't get out much to date. I don't know if that is good or bad. I am sick and tired of all of the shit you have to put up with when you're with a guy. The one thing I hate is, it seems that every man wants to have anal sex. I can't find a guy who doesn't beg to fuck me in the ass. Why is it that men like to do that? Don't they realize that an asshole is tiny? Maybe that is why they like to do it. I have no idea. I would be too afraid that I would get shit on my dick. I think I would vomit if I got shit on my dick. That is, if I was a man. Just the idea of getting shit on any part of your body other than your ass, is gross. Especially if it is someone else's shit!
Even though I don't feel like I need a man in my life, I have something to confess. This might sound a little crazy, but please don't think I am crazy. I guess it doesn't matter if you think I am crazy or not, I mean, you don't know who I really am. Though, I don't want you to think that I am crazy.

Sometimes I go to the store and buy the biggest, longest, banana that I can find. I take it home and I peel it. I then start to kiss on the top end of the banana. I wrap my lips around the top of it and suck a little. I do this for a few minutes, to get me all hot and horny. Then, I deep throat the banana while I play with myself. It makes me feel like I am sucking a dick while I play with myself. I know that sounds crazy, but sometimes I do get lonely for a man. I wouldn't say lonely in the sense that I want a relationship, but lonely in the sense that I need fucked!

This is a real story that took place at work. I was helping a man find a suit for a special occasion.

"Can I help you sir?" I said to the man as he walked around the store lost.

"Yes, I'm looking to buy a suit." He said.

"You have came to the right place." I joked.

I have never been able to understand why a guy answers like this. No shit he is looking to buy a suit. What did he come here to buy? Maybe a spice rack? Who the fuck knows.

"What kind of suit are you looking for?" I asked.

"Well, I want it to be somewhat casual. We are having a special dinner at work. I don't want the suit to look too up tight. But, I don't want to look mess." The man said as he looked around.

"Are you looking for a plain or stripped suit coat and pants?" I asked.

"I don't know. I don't own any stripped suits. Can we look at a few of those?" He asked.

"We sure can." I said while I motioned for him to follow me.

We had to have looked at twenty suit coats and pairs of pants. He said nothing looked right. Every one of them looked too lifeless he said. Then, he saw just what he was looking for.

"Does that one over there come in my size?" He asked.

"You mean the bright yellow one with the black stripes?" I asked.

"Yes." He said.

"I'm sure it does." I said walking over to check.

I couldn't believe how happy this guy seemed after he found this suit coat and pants. I don't want to seem offensive, but this is the type of suit that black men would buy. They tend to buy loud bright colors that almost make your eyes water.

"Do you have any rainbow colored ties?" He asked as he eyes got big.

"Rainbow?" I asked.

"Yes, you know, many colors." The man said with a smile on his face.

I didn't know to puke right there or to wait until I seen him wearing the suit. That is, if I was lucky enough to actually see him put on such a thing. Believe me, there was nothing lucky about seeing a man in a suit like this.

"Right this way." I said as I walked him over to the ties.

I wasn't too surprised when he picked out the one tie that rang out louder than the rest. It had so many colors of stripes, it seemed to scream louder than a siren on a speeding police car.

"Okay, now I just need a dress shirt." The man told me.

I didn't even think of taking him to the normal white shirts. I took him straight to the shirts that screamed out. You know the ones, the kind that have all colors of checkers on them. He picked out one that was even more absurd than the tie. I couldn't believe that he could find something like that. But, he did.

"Am I allowed to try this stuff on? You know, to make sure it fits?" The man asked.

I wanted to tell him no. Actually, I wanted to beg him not to. I didn't want everyone in sight to get sick. But, I had to. I didn't have no choice.

"Yes you may sir. Follow me to the dressing rooms." I said pointing as I walked.

He was in the dressing room for at least twenty minutes. I heard him making humming noises. Kind of like what a doctor would if he was checking you out. I had no idea what this weirdo was doing. As far as I cared, he would run away with the suit.

"Something just isn't right." He said as he opened the door.

She suit was so loud, it almost hurt my eyes looking at it. I'm not sure what was worse, the bright yellow of the suit, or all of the colors on the tie. I tell you this, it was one freaky looking suit.

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